Hey there, internet.

I wish I could update you on all the fantastical stuff that's been going on, but I'm sorry to say there just isn't that much. At least, not much that would make for interesting reading. The semester is winding down, and I'm looking forward to having the next month off from work. Not that it matters too much, as it will all be spent on school. Minus the 3 or 4 days Ella and I plan on going away to the beach.

So, since this is my blog and I can do whatever I want, I'm going to talk about a subject that has been coming up frequently for some reason.

Flags.

I dig flags. About as much as I dig metros. And I'm sorry, but there's a lot of really terrible flags out there in the world. Most countries have their shit together. There are actually rules by Vexillological Associations, which I think is a bit crazy. Who are these flag nazis to dictate style? Anyway, let's start with some good flags.

Italy - Looks like a pizza. BAM.

St. Kitts and Nevis. 2 islands. One is green, one is more rocky. BAM.

South Africa - When I see these colors, I think "Africa".

Antigua and Barbuda - Latin America has some great flags. Mountains, white sandy beach, ocean, sunrise. Awesome flag.

How about some bad ones?

Turkmenistan - How is anyone supposed to recognize the left side?!

Cyprus - This is literally just a map of your country on a white background.

Fiji - Aside from the UK "Flagception", an incredibly complicated seal to boot.

Brazil - Beautiful, except for all the incredibly tiny fine details. A motto in 4 pt font? And a star map? Please.

Now, I'm sure these are all fine countries with lovely people. But you need to work on your flags. You see what the difference is? The good ones are actually capable of being drawn by a kid. They're instantly recognizable from a large distance away. And they mean something. I feel then, it's only fair to talk about my country's flag.

Unfortunately, the US only gets criterion #3. Everything does mean something, and it's pretty blatant. 50 stars for the States, 13 stripes for the colonies, yadda yadda. But let's take the right sides of Malaysian, Liberian, and American flag.

Which shade of red is the USA's? I don't know. You need to count the stripes, which is not going to happen. Quick, try to draw the American flag now. Good luck trying to get all 13 of those stripes and 50 stars unless it's the size of an A4 sheet. If we ever get in a Liberian - American - Malaysian war, it's going to be chaos. It's not a great design, and I say we make it great again. (C) Trump Industries

So, let's look at Thailand's. Pretty good flag. It's easy to draw, recognizable, and there is meaning. Albeit, I think the meaning is a bit unclear.

Apparently, red stands for the land and people, white for religion and blue for monarchy. But there's no way to know that unless you're some sort of flag scholar. In fact, many of the examples I gave don't really have blatant meanings. There are very few flags that you can look at right away and say "I know the symbolism behind all of this." There are some really good examples that tick all 3 boxes, like Estonia.

Want to guess what their flag is like?

Nice.

There are also flags that say "To hell with all of your rules." Notably, Nepal. They are the only nation with a non-rectangular flag. But ya know, I like it. Looks like the sun over some mountains to me. It also looks really old school, medieval style. Way to go, Nepal.

Your flag rules suck and I hate them.

Or Sri Lanka. It's super complicated, but it's gone to "so complicated it's good" territory.

Lets have stripes AND a lion! With a sword! And a gold border! And little flame things!

There's also some seriously, seriously bad flags. Like, atrocious flags. Most of the US State flags are pretty bad. Although, Colorado and New Mexico's are exceptions. But the creme de la creme, the epitome of a terrible flag has to be Maryland.

This is not a flag. I have no idea what's going on here, but I feel that if I cross my eyes I should see a picture.

But don't feel bad, Maryland. Liberia's River Gee County will always be worse than you.