I don't know why, but Mandalay conjured up a picture in my mind before coming here. It sounds like a town from a fantasy novel, but the reality is sadly devoid of magic and swords. It's still a nice enough town, just not an exciting one. It reminds me of Vientiane. I like the city, like the people, but there's just nothing to do here. I arrived at 930am, had breakfast, and then just chilled out until 1pm before even starting my day. Yet I still finished all the attractions before sunset.

I started by heading to Mahamuni Pagoda, a big market / temple, of course. They let everyone, even idiots like me, walk up and put gold leaf on their very ornate Buddha. Apparently its the 2nd holiest place for Buddhists, so I suppose it's kind of a big deal? They had a lot of cameras, and the TVs outside showing a live broadcast on the Buddha Network, or whatever channel that is. So look for me on Myanmar TV tonight. I'm the white guy being scolded for taking photos. After checking out the market, it was off to Mandalay Palace.

Mandalay Palace is a ripoff. It's 10000 kyat to get in, and that ticket is supposed to get you in every sight around the north part of the city. In reality, it's for Mandalay Palace only. It's a massive complex, and you are barred from seeing 90% of it since it's still an active military base. The place itself is a nice view from on top of the watch tower, but up close the buildings are unimpressive and empty. If anyone ever goes to Mandalay, only do the palace if you want to pay $10 for a photo similar to mine. So anyway, off to Kuthodaw Paya and Sandar Mu Ni Pagoda.

These 2 places contain "The World's Largest Book". Yessss! I love "World's Blankiest Blank!" It's not exactly what you think though, it's a large series of tablets in little shrines detailing Buddha's story, and Buddhist Canon. It is quite large, probably larger than a football field. So, world's largest book - check.

Afterwards I was feeling tired so I stopped at a roadside sugar cane juice place for a refresher, and an hour nap, apparently. Which, if I may say, I never liked sugar cane juice that much until Myanmar. It's soooo good here, and tastes like... well, sugarcane. And not sugary water. Feeling refreshed, the next stop was a hike up to Mandalay Hill for the sunset. On the way up a surprisingly tall hill, I met 2 monks. They come to the hill every day to practice English with foreigners. One had been studying for only 6 months, but spoke better than most of my Thai students. See kids - put in the effort. Anyway we walked to the top, and we had a nice chat about life as a monk. At the top we ran into his monk friends, including Hein, a super cool dude who loved to talk. Having just learned English himself he's going to start teaching it, which is just beyond awesome. I was really impressed by his attitude and humor, and he was even cool enough to bring me back to my hostel on his bike. A+ guy all around.

And back at the hostel, I sampled the other Myanmar beer brands. I was always unimpressed with Myanmar Beer, just tastes like a standard lager like Bud. Mandalay beer is a little more skunky, like Heineken. Last was Dagon Beer, and the best in my opinion. But really you are really not missing anything. I'll take every Thai beer sans Cheers over every Myanmar beer.

The next morning was off to Pyin U Lwin, a sleepy town up in the hills. Except nobody seemed how to get there, even my hostel and the internet. After walking to 3 different "bus stations" and seeing no means of transport, I hired a motorbike taxi to take me to one and tell them where I'm going. I got a songthael, which works for me, as it's only 60km away. It was an interesting drive, being crammed in with the locals and 5 barrels of milk. I guess if we got thirsty we'd be set. Or maybe I could convince them to make sour cream a thing in Asia.

Arriving at Pyin U Lwin, it was lunchtime so I stopped by a local spot for food. I ordered chicken curry. Apparently that means "all the food currently in Pyin U Lwin with a side of chicken curry". Like, the pic doesn't do it justice. After I finished the cauliflower, she replaced it with another bowl. Then she filled up my rice. I realized that this was a never ending battle I could not win, so I decided to give up about trying to insult her for leaving food on the table. After I went to Kandawgyi Garden, which sounds a lot like the word for KFC in Chinese. Anyway, KFC Garden is really the only attraction of note in town, but it was maybe the tidiest place in Myanmar. It's more like a National Park than a garden, it's a massive complex with miniature zoos, conservatories, museums, playgrounds, observation towers - you name it, they've got it. It also had some very noisy monkeys. Jeez monkeys. This is a quite place, stfu. Anyway I spent a few hours there, then went back into town.

I think Pyin U Lwin's romantic nature is a little oversold. There were horse drawn carriages here and there, but when a common form of transportation in Myanmar is ox cart, a horse doesn't really seem out of place. I think it's more of a honeymoon getaway, as it's quiet, has nice air, and a pleasant mid 20s temperature. Back to Mandalay, I shared the songthael with Linda, who recently finished a 2 day meditation at Pyin U Lwin. She was a talkative one, almost like she was making up for the 2 days of silence. Back in Mandalay, I had about 5000 kyat left. I had heard it's nearly impossible to exchange kyat back into a useful currency, so after dinner, it was off to the grocery store. With some clever math, I managed to pick up some snacks and alcohol to take back to Bangkok, leaving only 200 kyat left as a souvenir. Seeya, Myanmar! You're an odd place, and not what I expected. I don't know how you went from near North Korea levels of isolation to "whatever, let all the tourists come" in such a short amount of time. But unfortunately, I can already see your pristineness vanishing. I mean, you just got Coke last year. Sure Coke is great, but you held out this long - keep it going! Anyway, for anyone out there who's curious, you should visit Myanmar as soon as you can. Because the country that was Myanmar is disappearing, fast on its way to rejoin modern society and losing a bit of itself in the shuffle. It's all downhill from here.

Against all odds I arrived in Bagan, aka Indiana Jones Playground, to find myself in a desert. I didn't know SE Asia had a desert. Some people say the military salted the land so nothing could ever grow here, drive the people out, and destroy the monuments. Seems unlikely unless they were airdropping tons of salt daily, it's a massive place.

For the 5km into town the taxi drivers offered an astronomical 5000 kyat a head, and I found 2 others going to the same hostel. We called the hostel and they sent a cab for 8k total. While we were waiting, the guy said 4k a head, then started to get pissed and tell us our taxi will get lost, and continued to harass us even after it arrived. It's a shame, as so far it was the only ripoff experience I've had so far. Anyway, after a curry lunch and renting an E-bike it was off to see some of Bagan.

Bagan is weird. As you can see from the photo, it is impossible to see everything. It's like Ayutthaya or Sukhothai on steroids, with some 3000 temples, and hardly any tourists in sight. And with so many, 9/10 times I had the entire place to myself. Basically Bagan is like this - you wake up before dawn, rent an e-bike, drive out to one of the many temples, climb to the top, and catch the sunrise. Then it's a day of you driving around the desert, seeing something interesting, playing on it for a bit, and occasionally stopping by the side of the road to pick up water and snacks. There are 3 towns around Bagan in a triangle shape, with small villages of a couple dozen people dotted around as well. So, if you break down, you're never more than a short distance away from help. The first day I saw, climbed on, and explored more ruins than I ever have, including Angkor Wat. You can really go hours without seeing people if you want, so you straight up do feel like Indiana Jones. I was hoping I would find some golden idol I could replace with a bag of sand, but no such luck.

Looking for a change in pace, the next morning some of the hostel goers and I shared a taxi to Mt. Popa. A giant, vertical cliff that sticks out like a pillar from the landscape, someone decided to put a shrine on the top, because Asia. They said there were 777 steps to the top, but it actually didn't seem like that many. Along the way there were monkeys. Godamn monkeys. And cats, it's like a contest to cram the most asshole animals in one place. The top is just a standard shrine, not much else. It's about the journey, not the destination, right? Back to town, we ate at Weatherspoons, which per these Dutch guys in Yangon, was "the third best burger in Asia." I think it's because in Asia there's no burgers for comparison besides McDonald's, but yeah, still a pretty darn good burger. After hitting a few more temples on the way back, that was it for Bagan. I guess I didn't really have much to say about it, but it was still my favorite part of the trip. It's a physically exhausting place, the sun and heat really get to you after a while. I think I need a vacation from my vacation, because besides drinking enough water to fill a lake, and reducing the world's sunscreen supply by 10%, it's basically like Angkor Wat without the tourists. As Myanmar continues to open up, in 5 years this place will be full of tourists and unrecognizable. I was lucky to be able to see it when I did.

Days 3 and 4 in Yangon were a bit more chill, with most of my "must sees" completed. Actually pretty much all the tourist sites for Yangon had been completed, and everyone at the hostel was pretty desperate to leave. I thought this city had more in store though, and I stuck around. Turns out that was a good decision. But still, I knew there wasn't much left, so I went to the train station to get my ticket. After that and a curry lunch, I started with Sein Yaung. A small temple that's just a footnote, its claim to fame is that the entire surface is mirrored. But, Myanmar is near the equator. And with the hot tropic sun that means Sein Yuang Temple is a giant heat beam of death and destruction. The walk up on hot pavement, no shoes of course, was piping hot and I rushed to get photos under much pain. So, you're welcome.

The next stop was also an odd one, the last emperor of India died in Yangon after he pissed of the British, and they sent him here. Now he is buried in a grand tomb befitting his greatness. Just kidding. He's in someone's back yard in a Yangon suburb. I swear that's true, it was hard to find the place nestled among the other houses. But he does have a proper temple, albeit small. And his body isn't behind some marble slab, nope. Just chilling in his coffin, go touch it if you want. Weird place.

Today was a bit brutal heat wise, topping out in the 40s (over 100F). But it didn't really bother me, I wasn't even sweating that much. I guess I am really used to this heat now. Regardless the next stop was the National Museum, a place I always like going to so I can find the moon rocks Nixon gave all the different countries. Also air conditioning.

The museum is massive, ugly building (not the one in the photo) containing some amazing artifacts in shitty cases. It's a shame, because spread over 5 floors, it kept me occupied for over 2 hours, and I travel fast. It could easily be a half day thing, and would be enjoyable if it didn't look like a high school from 1930. But it had some really amazing stuff, which you are not allowed to photograph. Sorry about that.Actually, not really. Seriously, this building exuded whatever the opposite of architectural beauty is.

After I went to Bogyoke market, but I ran into an Anglican Cathedral on the way. The Cathedral of the Holy Trinity was pretty, but closed. The market itself was too touristy for my tastes, flooded with Chinese tour groups. They were all eating at tourists restaurants where a Coke is $1 (normally 20 cents). I set out to find where the locals eat, and eventually found it. I had a feast for $1.20, and probably better food too. I was pretty tired and could tell I was starting to get heat stroke, so I went back to the hostel for the night.

The next day was a half one, since I had to catch a train in the afternoon. With 0 expectations, I decided to go to the other side of the river just, because. It turns out that was my favorite part of the trip. The boat was a giant ferry, and more of a literal floating market than a means of transport. These kids sold me seagull food for 100 kyat (10 cents), and man, the seagulls really came out of nowhere to eat it. On the other side, still with 0 tourists in sight, a bicycle taxi offered to take me around for 6000 kyat. It's kind of a ripoff, but I decided what the heck, it's 6 bucks. Turns out that was a good decision. He told me a lot about Myanmar, gave his blunt opinion on the government (bad), and his opinion on Buddhism (good). Mao Mao, or "Cat cat" in Chinese was a fun guy, carrying on about how he's going to marry Celine Dion and Rhianna. He took me to this village I definitely never would have found, basically poor people who live in bamboo huts by the river. After some hesitant stares, a bunch of kids ran up to me. Surprisingly not to sell me junk, but to touch my hair and arms. We just hung out playing with the kids and drinking tea, and it was a really nice day.

After lunch it was back to the train station for the 16 hour journey. I lucked out and shared a sleeper cabin with a Chinese American, so we had a lot to talk about. I had heard the train was an adventure, and they weren't kidding. British engineering at its finest, this was not a train. It was a rollercoaster. I initially had trouble sleeping because I became airborne several times, and would awake in midair. This led to thoughts I would never imagine having, such as "I wonder where I am going to land." and "It is possible the train has derailed." And honestly it doesn't seem that far fetched, after having to hold on because the train listed at a 45 degree angle. Regardless trains put me to sleep, and after wedging myself into a corner I managed to get a dusty 8 hours. While it was an unforgettable experience, I would not recommended it. The previously mentioned group from Yangon arrived just hours before me, despite leaving 24 hours earlier. Apparently their train kept losing cars, then having to go back for them. Then the engine car kept breaking down. Here I thought the Thai train system had issues - move over, Myanmar takes the cake.

Dirty. Chaotic. And somehow still sleepy, Yangon is not what I'd expect for a capital, even though I had 0 expectations before coming. And on top of that, I had 0 expectations for Myanmar. And what I learned is that Myanmar is an odd country. Well, not odd I suppose. But a weird mix blending East Asia with Middle East Asia. The people, food, and city are like a Venn Diagram of Chinese, Thai, and Indians. But on top of it, everyone has that Laotian kindness I miss so much. And to add a further spin to it, there's a dash of British culture for good measure - good for me, as they saw fit to use English. It's a strange crossing of cultures, set in a city that looks hundreds of years old, but is a sea of construction now that international sanctions have been lifted. Thanks, Obama.

And it's a country nobody knows much about, and maybe you don't either. Because the picture at the beginning of the blog isn't Myanmar, this is Myanmar.

A former British colony, after independence Myanmar, at the time called Burma, was ruled by a military junta up until a few years ago. Now, a prominent democratic activist has been released, open elections have occurred, and while the military is on the way out, their influence is still felt. It's almost like a child who got a new babysitter. They're not sure what they can get away with yet, so they keep trying stuff and see what works. Also with tourists now allowed into the country, it seems like they're trying to assemble a tourist industry from string and duct tape. There simply weren't and still aren't hotels to deal with the load. And the military hasn't completely loosened their grip, with only certain hotels being able to host foreigners. This leads to high hotel prices, but at least everything else is cheap enough to make up for it. And most of the time, the locals just don't know what to do with you. "What do they eat? What do they want to do? We don't know!" Most interesting tourist attractions have hastily written English signs, of course at much higher prices than the locals pay.

I arrived at Yangon around lunchtime, and shared a taxi into the city with 3 others. On the way in I saw a massive church which is an odd sight in Asia. So after getting settled, I set out to see it. It was a large cathedral, and oddly enough named St. Mary's. Pretty place, and probably an unexpected destination for a foreigner, because people kept staring at me. After, I had a sugar cane juice on the sidewalk and saw some kids with some face paint stuff. I've heard about it, it's some sort of traditional thing. Mostly girls wear it, but it's a sunblock, clears acne, and probably washes your car if you ask the manufacturer. It's probably like those scented bottles Thais carry around - useless, but whatever makes you feel better.

After I went into the city to Sule Pagoda. A big temple, it cost 3000 kyat ($3) for foreigners. It was fine, it's a wat. I also went to the park across the street to see a big statue thing. After walking outside and waiting to cross the street, some old guy asked "Where are you from?" I said America, and he replied "In Myanmar, you must learn to pray." I said "Oh, why is that?" "Because you must cross the street." I will admit the traffic is quite harrowing here. They drive very fast, and all rules are optional. Maybe there's a lot of new drivers with the sudden economic boom, because they all behave like they just got a new toy with nothing to lose. Ah well, when in Asia.

I finished my the religious tour with a jaunt to the Sri Kali Hindu temple. And with that it was off to Chinatown. I met my cab sharing buddy from earlier, with no help from the hostel's reception. The time passed we were supposed to meet, so I asked if she could pass a message. She said no. Then a guest said he was upstairs. I asked if I could go and get him. She said no. I asked if she could go tell him I'm here. She said no. I asked if I could write a note, and you leave it to on his bed. Again no. Well okay then. Later I was eating a delicious plate of noodles, and drinking on the road and he saw me. 60 cent beers, 80 cent cocktails. Oh, Myanmar. In Chinatown I could communicate for once, which was a nice change.

Next day, new friends Christine, Dave, and I shared a taxi to Chauk That Gyi. A 15 minute taxi turned into an hour one, though. The driver started going in not quite the right direction, and I thought "Well, maybe its a 1 way road, or traffic, or something." I asked if he's sure this is the right way, he waved me off. I asked again at another intersection, and then he turned in the complete opposite direction. Finally I shouted no, and guided him with the GPS. He finally realized where we wanted to go about 100 meters away from the temple, but just like Laos, didn't try to charge us more. Yay, friendliness! Anyway, move over, Wat Pho. This was the biggest godamn Buddha I've seen. I thought I've seen every possible Buddha. Nope. This one was the size of a jet, although the building wasn't pretty. They also had drawings of dreams, and their meanings. They were super specific, like "If you dream of a jackal peeing into a gem encrusted cup, that means your king will lower taxes." I was thinking "No time in however many hundreds of years this temple has existed was this advice applicable."

Someone at the hostel told us of this amazing pizza place (one of the best of his life apparently), and we were close to it, so we decided to go. We got a half prosciutto and half chicken pizza, and random hostel guy wasn't lying. At $20 split 3 ways, it's the most I've paid for a meal in a while, but it was one of, or very likely the best pizza I've had in my life. Who knew, Yangon knows how to make an amazing pizza. Everything was spot on, and I can't say enough good things about it. Get your shit together, rest of Asia. Some poor little country where there's hardly internet, and people live on a $1 per day can whip up an amazing pizza. What's your excuse?

After it was off to the park, where we saw some pretty bridges and fountains. My travel companions still were very hot and wanted to relax, which was not for me. I said bye and went off to the zoo next door. An odd find, the zoo claims to be one of the oldest in the world. And aside from the obviously dangerous animals like tigers, cages aren't really a thing there. The main strategy was "Just put a meter deep ditch around the area." Apparently elephants are freaked out by stairs, cause they wouldn't cross it. But of course their noses would and they loved to poke people walking by. The hippo area was a pit not much taller than the hippo, so he could put his face at the level of the enclosure. This turned out to be funny when a little kid peered over the ledge and found himself 6 inches away from a hippos face. He yelled and ran to mom, and I thought "That hippo probably could have eaten him if he wanted to."

After the zoo it was quite hot, but I passed by this kids amusement park full of super weird statues. It was 50 cents to go in, and I'm sure a single white guy taking pictures in a kids park was normal. But these statues... some were good, others were like a 5th grade art project. Of course this made them even funnier. Also there were dinosaurs.

I passed a mall, and thought maybe this will be my only chance to see a Burmese mall. Pretty nice, I had a 100+ Cola from Brunei. Later I would go back for dinner, from a Shan (northern) restaurant. It was a sort of noodle dish with chicken, onions, sauce, and crunchy bread crumbs - almost like croutons.

Last but not least for the day was Shwedagon Pagoda, whose name sounds like a drunk person slurring their words. The story goes when Buddha attained enlightenment, there were 2 merchants present. Buddha gave them 8 strands of his hair. Instead of saying "That's kinda gross, bro." They took them home and built a modest temple. Several kings made it bigger, and now it's a giant temple on a hill, with 3 escalators to get to the top. The top was a giant plaza of stuff, topped by an incredibly large chedi, the largest in the country and probably of most countries. While waiting for sunset I chatted with a monk who invited me to teach at his monastery. I'd love to, but unfortunately the dates just don't line up. I got a selfie and a Facebook friend though, cause monks are all about Facebook. I asked him what he called this country. He said Myanmar (the military's new name) because Burmese is an ethnic group, and there are more groups than just Burmese. Fair enough. It seems the younger people say Myanmar, while the older ones stick to Burma.

Back at the hostel, I ran into my companions. We ate at a local restaurant, and I joked with the girl I wanted that face paint stuff all the girls have. Turns out it's quite an ordeal. They mix this powder and water on a stone plate, then use a piece of sandalwood to grind it. Finally they use a brush to put it on. It got some laughs from the girl, her mom, and the patrons. It felt very cooling, almost minty. After it dried it felt fine, but before it itched a bit. Still, not the most uncomfortable thing. If it does protect like sunscreen I'd imagine it's much cheaper.

The last stop was back to Chinatown, because it was St. Patrick's Day. I started to explain to the locals what today was, but then I realized I don't even really know what it is. Something about leading snakes out of Ireland? Eventually I settled on "An Irish holiday where people drink and stuff is green." In celebration one drunk Chinese guy bought us a round of beers. Now I'm thinking I can just make up western holidays when talking to Chinese people and hopefully get free beers out of it.  Anyway, after a few I headed back. With so much of Yangon to discover, I didn't want to spend it hungover. Onto the next day!

I remember back when I was preparing to leave Taipei, I had the busiest week of my life. Which is still is true, but Bangkok is giving it a run for its money. With the semester over, I find there is just so much to do. For one, you have to compress your entire life into a suitcase again. Not to mention cleaning your apartment, looking for a new job, working out visas, how to transfer money, flights, travel arrangements, finishing out stuff at work, it's a full time job. It's been compounded with the fact I fly to Myanmar tomorrow, and this is the first chance I've had to sit down and write. Anyway, what have I been up to lately.

Obviously April and Cliff have left me (sadface), and Ella and I did manage to make it to the aforementioned wedding. It was really nice, ripped straight out of a postcard - right on the beach, with horses, and cosplayers. Yes, cosplayers. The bride is quite into it, and had her friends show up in costume. It was a very small ceremony, and I loved it. I've always liked going to weddings, because it's a party where everything is free, and everyone is usually in a super good mood and/because of the drinking. I really wish we could have enjoyed this one longer, but it was on a Sunday night and about 3 hours away from Bangkok. We had to work on Monday morning, so we had to rush back and get the last bus at 9pm so we could get back home by 1ish.

Other activities around Bangkok included a visit to Chinatown for Chinese New Year. Despite being Chinese New Year Eve, the ceremony was a bit more muted, with most of the big stuff planned for the following day. It was still awash in activity though, with everyone cleaning, booths and stages being constructed. and all manor of preparation going on. Apparently the Princess spoke the following day, who I've noticed becoming a much bigger deal over the past year or so I've been here. While the Prince is next in line, the Princess has started to appear on pictures in public, alongside or even in place of the King. We also stopped in to see the Sikh Temple in Bangkok, apparently the 3rd largest in the world. I don't know anything about Sikhism, but I guess I understand a little more now. They're quite nice people, and a large majority of their religion is devoted to pacifism, which is always a good thing. They also give out a free breakfast every day to travelers, homeless, or just anyone who wants it. I wish it was breakfast time when we went, because whatever they were cooking smelled absolutely delicious. A nice guy invited us to come upstairs to see the ceremony, and showed us how to tie this scarf thing we wore on our heads. He explained the priest, for lack of a better term, is not a priest at all - just a member of the church who decided "I want to lead the ceremony today." I think that's really cool. I got to eat this blessed bread, which, if I have to criticism Sikhism in some way, the bread tasted really weird - like a grainy pudding. But kidding aside, everyone there was super nice, took the time to chat with us, and were nothing but welcoming and cool.

With Heather moving to her new place in On Nut, we spent the day out with her seeing some sights. We went to an artists village along a canal, and went to a Laos Flute Village. It's pretty off the mainstream tourist circuit, and this "village" is apparently just some dude's house. Of course it was pretty hard to find then, but eventually we found it. They invited us inside to this guys living room, and he showed us all the flutes he made, and invited us to play some. Seeing as how I have the musical ability of... something with no musical ability, I butchered it badly. Of course Ella was playing like a master within 30 seconds of seeing the thing, even having a duet with 85-year old flute guy. Jeez Ella, way to make the rest of the world look bad. We also went to see a temple I've passed many times but have not seen, Wat Ratchabopit Sathitmahasimaram Ratchaworawihan. Maybe that's the longest Wat name so far. It's quite pretty, and despite being near the big central, tourist area, doesn't really seem that popular. I don't know why, it should get a lot more attention. After, we met up with Dmytro at the Siam Museum. I've been here a few times, and it's definitely my favorite museum in Bangkok. If you're curious what it's like, the entry talking about it is here.

Changing gears, there's also been some excursions outside of Bangkok. A long time ago, on the way to Kanchanaburi, the train stopped in a town called Nakhon Pathom. Heather, Ella, and I took an hour or so bus to see the chedi in the middle of town, at Wat Phra Pathom Chedi Ratchaworawihan (not the longest name). But something I had not seen is the Sanam Chad Royal Palace. It was built for Rama VII, who unlike other palaces it seems it was actually used. Also, he really, really liked his dog. There were pictures of this dog everywhere, and he even had a giant statue built for his dog when it died. It was a really beautiful place, probably one of the best palaces I've seen in Thailand. Cause, ya know, there's just so many. The real star was just before the palace, there was a small zoo we randomly came across. One of the monkeys there was named Soda, and quite liked swinging by his arms and being loud. At one point we gave him a banana. He picked it up, smelled it, and threw it on the ground like a fussy child. Well, fuck you, Soda! See if we ever give you a banana again!

Pictured: Not allowed in Burma

And finally, for the last few days I made two trips to Khao Yai with two different groups of students. Khao Yai is a National Park not too far from Bangkok, which seems to be renowned for its waterfalls. But it's the dry season, which means those waterfalls either don't exist or are tricklefalls. Regardless there would be no trekking, instead we just stayed at a big conference room to do activities. Because it's not like we couldn't do that in Bangkok. We did however go to the Chulachomklao Royal Military Academy. At first there was a small museum talking about the Thai Military. Not overly exciting, but Dmytro and I played around with the different statues. After that was the real highlight of the trip, they had zip lining, guns, bikes, and archery. We managed to secure a 3-person bike, kidnapped the Chinese teacher, and rode around for a bit. I've never done a bicycle built for 2, but a bicycle built for 3 is really damn hard to use. The activities involved us singing and dancing a Thai song called "Chang Chang Chang". It's an elephant talking about his tusks, ears, etc. Of course we butchered it. That's kind of the point. The students also had various talent shows, which many were entertaining. Many, if they were to occur in America, would be raided by child protective services. The sexually liberated culture of Thailand does not know age, so it was quite odd seeing my 12 year old students go bananas in very inappropriate ways. Hey, when in Rome. On the way back we got stuck in some pretty bad traffic, and one fashion-minded kid styled Dmytro's and my hair with lots of waxes, gels, and who knows what. After looking quite dapper, we played a truth or dare type of game, and a hand slapping game. Eventually our hands got sore from slapping each other, so it changed to eating these really hot wasabi peanuts - or more accurately, hold x number in your mouth for x duration depending on how much you lost. It was good fun, and seeing the others and myself tear up from the heat brought lots of laughs. The whole situation was actually really fun, and something I'll remember for a long time. On a long car trip, maybe I'll use that game again.

Whew! All caught up now. As mentioned, tomorrow is a trip to Myanmar/Burma. It's a bit off the tourist circuit, so I'm excited at the prospect of walking around the city and actually feeling out of place again. Fingers crossed.

Oh, and for an added bonus - a video of the kind of stuff we saw at the talent show. That is a boy wearing a women's clothes and a wig. Oh, Thailand.