2020. Huh.

So, not gonna lie, things have been a bit rocky this year. It seems whenever the world moves in what most see as the wrong direction, I get a message here and there from friends back in the States asking "So, how do I move out of the country?" I know most are just joking, and instead just being a good friend to catch up with. But the last time I got this many messages was in 2016 (try to guess what happened then!) But even if it's out of casual curiosity or genuine interest, I've still had to answer the same questions often enough, I thought I could write up a brief, "This is what moving abroad and starting life as an English teacher is all about", that I could point to if anyone asks. I should mention Ella and my book (available at Amazon! But for real, I'll send you a copy if you don't feel like buying it) goes into a lot more detail, but basically, assuming we all get over this COVID-19 thing and get back to normal, this is the process:

I love this cover so much. Thanks again Steve!

First, pick a country. Mainland China is definitely the largest market out there right now, and the easiest to get a job. If you're not too picky about where you end up, you will seriously have a job before you finish typing the E-mail. (I kid, but demand is sky high, you should have no trouble.) I'm going to talk about China, since I'm the most recently familiar with it, but the process for other countries is pretty much the same. Behind Mainland China, Korea, Vietnam, Taiwan, and Thailand have pretty significant demand. Smaller markets are Japan, Turkey, Russia, and a handful of other places.

Each have their own requirements, but in general, you need a passport from an English speaking country and Bachelor's Degree in anything (literally anything). You also need a health and background check, which are easy enough to get. So far, pretty routine. The only thing that will throw you is that you probably need a 120-hour (or more) TEFL Certificate, or at least will get one before leaving. You can do these online, though in-person is held in higher regard. To be honest, people rarely check. It won't take you 120 hours to complete unless you work really slowly - maybe closer to 30 hours of real work overall. They vary in cost, but the competition has driven down the price to about $50 when they're on sale. Groupon is usually a good place to look.

Now, find a job. There are country-specific job sites that may be better, but the larger, more general ones are:

ESL Cafe (probably the best for entry level)
TEFL.com
Teachaway
Teaching Nomad (geared a bit past entry level, but still lots of stuff)

I miss this class. They were amazing.

Your job will either be in a language center or school. Language Centers will be ~70% of the jobs listed, and the ones most likely to employ entry-level teachers. They're after-school study, cram school sort of places, often in malls or other convenient areas. Language centers take everyone, at all times of the year. Weekends will be the busiest time, where you'll work 9-5ish. The weekdays will be 4-9pm or so. You'll have two weekdays off per week. In general, you'll teach about 20-25 classes a week. Each class is about 45 minutes. Doing the math, this doesn't fill out to be 40 hours a week, so the "remainder" will be admin work and especially lesson planning. As a new teacher, you will probably spend a lot of time lesson planning until you get better at it - maybe 1 minute of planning per minute of teaching, in general. But you'll get the hang of it after a few weeks and can re-use plans, so things will quickly get more chill. You'll be teaching mostly children, roughly age 3 to 12, along with some teenagers and adults. If the students are really young, you'll have a teaching assistant. During the summer break, things will pick up, and you may work extra. There will be holidays here and there, and you can expect a little PTO, but language centers go year round, so there's no long breaks. You'll get paid above an average salary for people in that country. If you don't go nuts, you can save a fair amount.

Personally, I started my teaching by working in two language centers for a year (one in Mainland China, one in Taiwan), and while at first it was a bit of work, after a month or so it became much more chill than my old 9-5 in the States - I probably worked about 30-35 hours a week. I got faster, more efficient, and the kids there tended to be really good. It's a pretty silly job at times, because you're sort of paraded around as a "showpiece" foreigner who is going to come and give your kids an amazing western educational experience. Also since you don't have a weekend, and are far from home with other foreigners, you tend to form close friends with your coworkers. It was a very college dorm, "retreat" kind of experience. It was really a lot of fun, but professionally you can probably do better after working there for a year or so.

This was a recent class. 9/10 of them are great! 1/10... oi.

Such as in a school! Schools are harder to get into for the entry level teachers, though you may have better luck with a more suburban position. Schools tend to hire around 3 months or so before the start of the academic (August) year. There's a smaller demand for the Spring semester and the rest of the year, but you may get lucky if a teacher decided to leave. Overall you will have fewer teaching hours, and the lessons tend to be shorter - 40 minutes or so. You can also re-use your lesson plans a lot more often. And then of course, you get a regular M-F schedule and breaks between semesters. All in all, schools are a lot less work. For entry level teachers, the pay is similar or a little below a language center, but the ceiling is a lot higher. Still, it will be plenty to live on and well above what most people in the country make.

I pretty much teach exclusively in schools now, because I like a regular M-F schedule and the breaks. The breaks let me chill and work on my professional development, and I consider myself semi-retired at this point (Honestly, I probably "work" 15-20 hours a week during the school year, and not at all about 3 months out of the year). However, schools don't have that "college retreat" atmosphere language centers have, so they're probably less fun. Also since it's a school, you get the whole range of students, including those who may not be the best academic or behavior wise (and believe me, they will try your patience). Overall, I'm glad I cut my teeth in a language center, because it was a lot of fun and I got thrown in the deep end with a bunch of other people who just also got thrown in the deep end.

The question I hear most often is "But I don't speak the language, how can I live in another country?" And honestly, you don't need to. Your work will be entirely in English, and schools have a coordinator to help you open a bank account, get a SIM card, etc.. Of course, even a little bit of study to learn the basics like "How much is this?" and "Can I have X, please?" will make your life much easier. But if you've ever traveled abroad before, it's not much different. Pointing, gesturing go a long way, and if all else fails, Google Translate has got your back. I mean, after a few weeks the local restaurants and shops will know you, and will do what they can to be helpful. And unless you're far out in the sticks, there will be an expat community of people from the US, UK, South Africa, Australia, and so on that you can connect with and help each other out.

As far as how you actually teach, your TEFL Cert training should cover that. A common method for kids is Present Practice Produce (PPP). That is, Present the new language (lecture), let them Practice it in a structured environment (like a worksheet), and then let them Produce it in the most authentic way they can in a classroom (such as a roleplay). This is by no means the only way, and there's a lot more to consider, but it's not exactly rocket science. Our book discusses different methods and goes into more detail.

And that's about it for the entry level, to be honest. Of course, there's a lot of variables, YMMV, etc.. And things are a bit different if you have a teaching degree and experience, but not terribly so. For everyone looking to make the jump, it's one of the best decisions I ever made in my life. Throw me a message if you're really interested and we can talk specifics.

I'm about to blow the expat math world on its head. Let me recount a story called, "The Only Non-Awesome Australian Guy I've Ever Met".

I was coming back to Taiwan from The Philippines, waiting in the Manila Airport, and an Australian guy sitting next to me started up a conversation. This is awesome. Every Australian I have ever met has been a ton of fun. He was not fun. He went on to brag about how much money he spent in The Philippines eating western food, doing typical western tourist things you can do everywhere, and saying borderline racist things about the locals. When I countered with... well, the opposite of all of that, he seemed a bit annoyed, and told me how I am wasting my time traveling on a small budget and doing these silly things. I have never forgotten about Asshole Australian Guy (AAG), because at the time I thought "Hm, this guy is kind of an asshole." And then later, I felt pity: for one, that he felt the need to flex on a random stranger, and two, that despite going to The Philippines, I don't think he ever really experienced it. But AAG underscores a point I have seen, unfortunately, much too often during my time abroad. There are expats who want the country to be something it's not, are not willing to find out, and are not happy about it.

And this puzzles me, to be honest. What a boring world it would be if every country was the same! Why go visit or live somewhere different if you don't want it to be different? It's an old adage, but you are welcome to leave whenever you like - especially as an Expat English teacher. Guys, we have so many opportunities throughout the world, it's insane. I feel very lucky to be sure, but I could literally hop on a plane to another country today (Ella willing) and be fine. But still, others remain, and just gradually complain more and more until they do a midnight run. If only there was some way to know when the desk next to you will mysteriously be empty the next day! Well, I am proud to unveil The Expat Corollary of Bitterness:

T = se - c

Where "T" is the amount of time they will spend in the country, "s" is their stubbornness, "e" is the ease of maintaining their old life in their new country, and "c" is the current situation in their home country.

It's the ideal formula for all your expat assessment needs. Let's take for example Colleague A, who has tried in vain to find a decent BBQ restaurant, which is a key part of their identity. However they have picked up a bit of the local language to help fit in, likes their job, is dating a local who is way out of their league, and the situation in their home country is not so great. Plugging in the numbers, they will remain for exactly 1735.56 kilomoments.

Then let's look at Colleague B. Colleague B is from a rich family who wanted an easy job, but realized that being completely unqualified except for being foreign does not mean you get the best positions. Meanwhile, all the deodorant is weird, chopsticks befuddle them, and they say "I just don't understand why X people do Y" on a daily basis. They will stay in the country for 489.12 'shakes-of-a-lambs-tail' (add 36 if the Starbucks across the street finishes construction).

I hereby release this formula into the public domain, for the betterment of all expats worldwide. Try it out if you're an admin, a local dating an expat, or just wondering if your friend is ever going to pay you back that 100 kuai you lent him.